Should you reward your child with stickers or money for taking time to read or do chores?

Rewarding children with stickers and in some families even with money to boost the amount of time youngsters spend on unappealing tasks is a hot topic these days.

The school of thought is that the more routine a certain behavior becomes, eventually, it just becomes part of who he is. As those behaviors become more habitual, parents can either give rewards less frequently, or switch to a new focus of behavior and pattern

Many psychologists believe that over time, as good behavior becomes more common, it crowds out and ultimately replace negative behaviors.

Then there is the study from the Washington University in St. Louis, in collaboration with Richard A. Abrams, PhD, professor of psychology, which suggests that punishments are more likely to influence behavior than rewards. The study found that losses of privilege, or punishments, had a measured impact two to three times greater than gains - or rewards.

Probably for every study that argues for rewarding your child with stickers, ice-cream or one-dollar bills, there is another questioning it effectiveness.

I believe for children to be successful in the future, they must be team players, rather than competitors. The most successful individuals and businesses of the 21st Century are those that put the needs and wants of people first, and profits and success will come automatically. Do what’s good for the people, and people will do you good.

I do not believe you can teach this by rewarding stickers, but by raising a child with plenty of love and compassion. When you do that, you introduce him to the 3 traits of empathy: cognitive, emotional, and compassionate responsiveness. He will be able to understand what another person is experiencing from within their frame of reference, or in other words he will be to put himself in someone else's shoes.

How do you do that? Start by reading to your child out loud - as early as possible. The bond you cultivate between him and you is invaluable. By reading to your child, you will form his listening skills, improve his concentration, exercise his brain, develop his imagination, and teach him about the world around him

When you have founded a meaningful bond with your child, trust me, asking him to put his clothing into the hamper will not require you to entice him with ice-cream, reward-stickers or one-dollar bills.

Please follow my hashtag #ReadToKids on social media.